Today I went and visited an ENT physician for the nearly chronic laryngitis, soreness and hoarsness of my throat. After waiting for what seemed an eternity, I was called back and placed into a room. Ironic, I thought, as a nurse, I am now on the opposite end of the spectrum....a patient. Alot of "What If's" floated through my head. I was nervous as hell and would have killed for an Ativan. Fear of the unknown is one that tops my list of fears immensly (next to snakes).
Before my exam began the physician stated that he and Mark had gone to medical school together. He asked how Mark was and I felt was diving into my personal business a bit to much. So, with little info given to him he proceeded. Though he was nice to look at. Again, I am married not dead!! He placed some mirrored instruments into my mouth and began to look down into my throat and proceeded to tell me that I have what appeared to be two Polyps on my vocal chords. These polyps are what seem's to cause my normal raspy voice, the frequent voice loss, hoarsness and soreness. He stated he thinks that I should consider having them removed. There are dangers in removing them. But, after much thought and talking to Mark, I think the Pro's out weigh the Con's. Vocal chord damage vs chronic inflammation and soreness.

I have never had surgery at any point in my life. Plus, with surgery, I now have to figure out what exactly I can take afterwards for pain medicine so that I wont fall back into addiction. Mark says, there is nothing to worry about there. I guess, the whole point of surgery is just frightening.