Today, marked a very pivotal moment in my life. A life changing encounter with an old high school friend of mine.
I think that everyone would like to think that they somehow helped or changed another persons life maybe atleast once during their lifetime. Either through a small "pep talk", an understanding ear, maybe even some wise words spoken. All of my life, I thought and felt that I had never had this effect on anyone. Shamelessly, I admit, growing up I was selfish, arrogant and anyone who knows about my life growing up will understand when I say that these actions were because I always felt that I was never loved by anyone after I lost my grandmother and with that I never really even felt wanted by anyone after that. I felt I was tolerated and most of the time...just in the way. What I did not know until today is that....I was never perceived to be that selfish, arrogant individual....not by one certain individual anyway. An unexpected knock on my front door from my old school mate, Michele, this morning proved this to me and also.....has given me so much strength and a sense of accomplishment in my life that I will never ever look at my life the same way.

I met Michele when I was in the first grade of school. She had been held back that year due to a learning disability and the kids seemed to single her out and pick on her terribly. Michele also suffered from Scoliosis and had to wear a back brace and unfortunately also had a lazy eye. Her left eye. As I said, with all of the kids knowing she had been held back into the first grade plus her medical conditions, they singled her out and picked on her rather horribly. Michele loved music as much as I did and we formed a special bond. I remember her mother, Charlotte, even coming to the school one time and speaking to us kids in the class about certain ones teasing and mentally torturing Michele. She asked for those in the class to please stop and to please try to get to know the good person that Michele is. I always took up for Michele. When someone began teasing her and making her cry, I would step up and sometimes this led to me getting into actual fist fights with other kids and on a few occassions being suspended from school.

Michele and I began our friendship that year in the first grade and went through every other grade together until we graduated from high school. Everyone knows that when making the transition from childhood into young adult hood that new friendships are begun and some friendships just sort of "Go Away". This happened to Michele and I. We always greeted one another happily but then we went our seperate ways with our "New friends." The teasing had subsided after Michele had her back brace removed and became known for being an excellent dancer around the time of middle school years.

Today, around 2:00pm, there was a knock on my front door. My housekeeper Mary answered it and told me that a young lady was here to see me. As I walked from the patio into the living room I couldnt believe my eyes. It was Michele and in her hand she had a big blue book. We began catching up on one another's lives and Michele said that her mother, Charlotte, had told her that she had seen me the other day and told her how great I looked. That I had kicked my narcotic habit, looked well and was committed to a guy named Mark. While Michele and her mother had this conversation, Michele told her mother how important she felt I had been in her life while growing up. The defending her in school and always reminding her that she was a great person and had nothing to be ashamed of. All of these years....Michele never forgot my acts of kindness to her in Primary and Elementary school. Shamefully, I admit, I had forgotten. Maybe, because I never felt I had gone out of my way to do those things for Michele, I felt that it was the right thing to do AND she WAS and IS that great person I always thought of her to be. Simply put, she was my friend and that is what friends do for other friends. You "Got one another's back" so to speak.

While Michele and I were talking she thanked me for being that person who made her feel important, special and loved. Michele then told me that she had recently lost her grandmother. A pain I know all to well. As I said before, Michele had an incredible loving relationship with her grandmother as I had with mine. It was then Michele placed the big blue book onto the table in front of me and said that she wanted me to accept this gift from her. It was a Bible that Michele had given to her grandmother and the inscription inside read "To My Sweet Mom Mom, Given to you on this Christmas Day 1999, From your grandbaby Michele, I Love You Bunches." Michele told me that there was alot of love in this Bible and she wanted to pass that love onto me in thanks for all I did for her when we were children. Her grandmother thought alot of me as well and she would want for me to have it as much as Michele wanted me to. I had no idea that I had affected anyone's life positively at all until this very moment. All of those years I spent numbing myself from any type of real feelings with drugs....and for what???? If I had only known. But the bright side to that tragedy is that I am now clean...and am alive to expierence such a great gift. To now live everyday knowing that in my life and on this journey, I have accomplished something worthwhile. I made a difference in someone's life. I told Michele that I do believe that GOD works in mysterious ways. I have presently been on a path of spiritual enlightenment and it shouldn't be her that is thanking me...it should be I Thanking HER. Michele, I know that you said you will visit here to my blog to see how I am doing so I know that this post should not come as a great shock to you. I want you to know that I plan to use this Bible in my upcoming Disciple class. Everytime I open it's pages I will remember all of the love that is held inside this book between your grandmother and yourself. I will never forget it, I will never abuse it. On my journey...I am going to add some more love to it's story and then when it is time, I too will pass the book down to someone who I feel deserves it.............I Love You.....Harry